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Thomas McGinnis will never forget what happened at 9:30 p.m. on Dec. 4, 2006.
Two soldiers stood at his front door. They came to tell him and his wife, Romayne, that their only son and youngest child, Spc. Ross McGinnis, had been killed in action in Adhamiyah, Iraq.
"I can't imagine ever feeling worse than the night they showed up," Thomas McGinnis said. "It's hard to describe it. I knew as soon as I saw those two soldiers on the doorstep. They could have gone home and I would've known."
Ross McGinnis, of 1st Platoon, Charlie Company, 1st Battalion, 26th Infantry Regiment, died when he used his body to smother a grenade that had been thrown into his Humvee.
The 19-year-old was the gunner on the last truck in a six-vehicle convoy that was patrolling the streets of the volatile Adhamiyah neighborhood of Baghdad.
The lanky young man had time to jump out of the Humvee, just as he was trained to do, but he chose not to, fearing that his fellow soldiers wouldn't have time to escape. The grenade detonated as soon as Ross McGinnis threw his body on it, striking him on his sides and lower back, under his vest. The other four soldiers in the truck were injured but they all survived.
McGinnis is credited with saving the lives of his brothers in arms and was awarded the Silver Star, the third-highest award for valor. He has been nominated for the Medal of Honor, the nation's highest award for valor.
Only two service members, a soldier and a Marine, have been awarded the Medal of Honor for their actions in Iraq. Both awards were given posthumously.
On March 23, less than four months after his death, the McGinnis family had a traditional military service for him at Arlington National Cemetery, laying his remains to rest in the grassy, hallowed ground.
The same day, three of the men who were in the Humvee with Ross McGinnis got the chance to meet the McGinnis family face to face. Sgt. 1st Class Cedric D. Thomas and Sgt. Lyle Buehler were allowed to leave Adhamiyah, where Charlie Company is still serving, for the ceremony.
Staff Sgt. Ian Newland flew from Schweinfurt, Germany, where he is recovering from his injuries.
Pfc. Sean Lawson, 1st Platoon's medic, another soldier in the Humvee, had to stay in Adhamiyah.
"I told them they should not feel indebted to Ross," Thomas McGinnis said. "They don't owe him anything. The most important thing to Ross was his friends, long before this."
Romayne McGinnis said she told the soldiers that she loved them.
"I said they were doing a good job and we want them to come home and be safe," she said.
The soldiers didn't say very much to them, Thomas McGinnis said.
"I think they were pretty much at a loss for words," he said.
Thomas was Ross McGinnis' platoon sergeant. He was sitting in the front passenger seat of the Humvee when the grenade exploded, and he suffered minor lacerations on his left shoulder and neck and a large contusion on his back.
Thomas and Romayne McGinnis "are two of the most special people a person could meet," Sgt. 1st Class Thomas said. "Thomas, he was so professional, real stern and strong. It kind of made me feel like I was his son. The first time I saw Romayne, I looked her in the eyes. I said, 'You must be Romayne.' Ross looks like his mother. You could see Ross in his mother. I gave her a big hug."
Thomas said he was supposed to call the McGinnis family after the incident, but he didn't.
"I didn't want to call them and say the exact same thing everyone was saying, when I knew I had a really good chance of seeing them in person and saying, 'It's me, and I'm sorry,'" Thomas said.
Meeting the family "makes me put a lot behind me," he said. "There will be a forever connection or bond with me and the McGinnis family."
Newland was the most seriously wounded of the four surviving soldiers. When the grenade exploded, Newland received shrapnel everywhere except his chest. The median nerve in his left arm was destroyed and he still has more than 50 pieces of shrapnel in his body. He suffers from nightmares and constant pain, and undergoes physical and occupational therapy eight to 10 hours a day.
Meeting the McGinnis family, including daughters Rebecca, 24, and Kathryn, 22, was good for him, Newland said.
"It was very emotional," he said. "I couldn't believe how welcoming and friendly they were. His mom, the first thing she said to me when she hugged me was she loved me. That just grabbed my heart."
Ross McGinnis' death was difficult to deal with, Newland said.
"You become like a family," Newland said about the soldiers he served with. "You get to the point where you know how your soldiers think. You look at them and you know how they feel."
Buehler, who spent three days at the combat support hospital in the International Zone for shrapnel in his right thigh, right shoulder and the right side of his face, was the driver of the Humvee. That patrol was his first after returning from his two-week leave.
"Especially right after it happened, I had a lot of guilt," he said. "You get the feeling that we could have done something differently."
Meeting the McGinnis family "helped me cope with everything that happened," Buehler said.
But it was difficult to know what to say to the family, Buehler and Newland both said.
"There are so many things you want to say," Newland said. "I told [Romayne McGinnis] her son was amazing. He was a great soldier. Every now and again you get that soldier who wants to be in the Army. They really shine, and it shows."
Thomas said he's glad his company and former commander Capt. Michael Baka let him and Buehler return to the States for the service.
"This is one situation where our unit allowed us to do something for ourselves," he said. "That's signs of a great unit."
Thomas McGinnis said all he really wants is the chance to some day sit down with these soldiers and "get past the small talk" and talk about his son and their experiences together.
Sgt. 1st Class Thomas said he promised Romayne McGinnis that he would share with her stories about her son after returning from Iraq.
"But there's nothing that I really wish I would have said," Thomas said. "There's not too much to say. Everything's been said. He's my soldier, he's my friend."
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