With Thanksgiving meals consumed and families around the country settling in for wondrous, near-mythical food comas, we didn’t want to end the day without paying homage to that ol' brown bag that has served as a turkey day substitute for many-a-service member throughout our nation’s history.
The Meal, Ready-to-Eat — or Meal, Refusing-to-Exit, as it is affectionately known among constipated troops — is jam-packed with the kind of astronomical calorie and sodium counts needed to fuel service members in various endeavors — like 17-year wars, for example.
Personnel who have deployed or been on extended field ops know that the trading of MRE items becomes a major source of currency exchange. Pick any remote corner of the world — items like poppy pound cakes and strawberry milkshakes are changing hands.
We sincerely hope you’re not among that number today and that you’re enjoying a hearty meal with loved ones, but for your MRE amusement, YouTube sensation Alonzo Lerone dived headfirst into a number of items from that treasured brown bag.
His comments do not disappoint. Among them:
- “I feel like I made this in preschool. This is like Play-Doh."
- “I think I’m tasting blood."
- “Oh my gosh, that looks like homicide. Is that a tooth?"
- “I will sue my country. I will sue the president.”
Enjoy. And Happy Thanksgiving.